We have almost all heard the saying “opposites attract.” Well, I am finding that to be more and more true than ever before when I look at the big picture.
My boyfriend and I could not be more different personality-wise—ask anyone who knows us both. And yes, it does lead to the occasional stupid tiff on the everyday stuff like time and stress and how differently we handle life. But being with someone so different is so much more fun. You learn more about life and everything is always interesting and there is never a dull day. Some of the coolest couples I have met here at Drake are made of people very different from one another in a lot of ways but still manage to have great, lasting and enjoyable relationships.
We have all come across people in our lives who we thought, “I could never be friends with that person” or “I could never be with them because of how completely opposite we are.” We are at college to learn, and some of the most important lessons you will learn through interactions and relationships with your peers. What are you learning if you only spend time with clones of yourself and shut everyone else out? Your interaction skills and patience levels will be way below par if you continue that behavior all the way through graduation and your only other interaction is forced because it’s in class. Because let’s face it: In the real world, you do not get to choose whom you have your cubicle next to or who your boss is. You should give everyone an equal opportunity and not judge someone before you have even ever spoken to him or her before. Basically, what I am trying to get across is to give someone a chance that you would otherwise maybe not.
What are you getting out of dating someone who is just like you? Even taking a look at your friends: While you probably share many things, like you are both driven or have some similar morals, you usually are pretty different—and that’s what makes life interesting. I do agree that you should be similar in the important stuff like morals and values; the core stuff is important and that’s what keeps a relationship strong and lasting. Look at fraternities and sororities, whether professional or social: The people involved are extremely different, but the core values and/or goals are usually the same. Those organizations are successful because members learn so much from their sisters and brothers because they open each other’s eyes to different ways of life and beliefs, and never would have opened if it were not for them.
It can be more fun to be close friends with people who have completely different majors and are involved in different organizations. My room, for example, is made up of the dance team captains and the other is in Drake Environmental Action League, so let’s just say we always have something to talk about because each of our days are so unique from the other’s. If you’re in the same organizations, classes and always spend your free time with the same people, you kind of have to ask yourself, “What am I really getting out of college besides a degree?”
I am not saying be friends with everyone or even be super nice to everyone who crosses your path, or be a dating machine and date a whole bunch of people who are simply not right for you to test the theory. But at least give people a first or even second chance before you decide you don’t want anything to do with them.
The bottom line is that whoever you are with, you should have fun with and they should challenge you to think differently. So maybe give that person you just thought was a friend an opportunity for something more. After all, they always say the best relationships grow out of friendships.
